Birth Story

Newly Pregnant

36-ish Weeks

Ok, third time is a charm. This is my third attempt at writing this (note to self- the mobile version of Blogger does not save drafts...or I haven't figured it out anyhow). So I wish I had blogged more during pregnancy, but there wasn't much to say. I thought about blogging my feelings/emotional experiences, but any time I would start to put it together in my head it would start one way and take off into a totally different direction that even I couldn't follow. So, it didn't happen. To sum up the time that I baked our little bun, I had a cervical cerclage placed at week 14 and removed at week 36. I was pretty inactive throughout pregnancy- I probably could have done more. However, we also had a very uneventful pregnancy in terms of stress and injury. Somewhere in the late 20's we saw that my cervix had started to funnel towards the stitch, so any hope I had of becoming active with that stitch in was gone. Oh, when it came out though! I had missed moving so much! I walked and bounced and stretched....apparently until he just had to come out!

Cerclage Day

Bouncing the baby out, apparently!

(If you would like to know more about cervical cerclage please comment- I'm not sure anyone will read this but I'd love to write more in detail when I get the chance).

So this brings us up to my 37 week routine appointment. (Apparently no selfie was taken on this day :( ). This was the OB's ultimate goal, anything after week 37 would have been great for delivery. At 37 weeks 1 day I had my cervix checked for the third time. Mike joked that it would be great if I happened to be like, 4 cm dilated and in labor. I had hoped, actually I had hoped the whole pregnancy that I would discover I was in labor in the doctor's office- I spent 37 weeks telling her I didn't think I would feel/recognize contractions because I hadn't with Landon up until the moment he was born, even if he was only 19 sweet weeks. So, I had hoped, but had resided myself to the fact that many cerclage patients actually go beyond their due date because of scar tissue- it just works that well. My wonderful doctor came in and asked some questions, I told her I felt a little off but no physical change, hardly even any Braxton Hicks contractions anymore, they had fizzled out over the previous weeks (that was of course until she lay me down to check me, I had one cute little BH then). "Mikael Mikael Mikael....you are 4 cm and fully effaced". She asked how long I had been contracting and I told her I had no clue, that I wasn't feeling a thing. So she sent me across the parking lot to L&D. The plan was to monitor me for at least a few hours. If my contractions were really spaced out and weak we may have been sent home but any sort of consistency and we would keep me. Now, this was the plan due to the fact that I was feeling nothing, my water was nearly bulging, and mostly, we live an hour from the hospital. Off we went to get checked in, trying to grasp the fact that it was probably baby day!

Getting all hooked up!

The room was beautiful (thank you, Tricare).

I was having consistent contractions, but no real pattern. They were strong enough and regular enough though, to keep me. We walked the halls a little and the room. When my doctor came in she was pretty excited and told me she'd like to break my waters. Now, this is a decision I've thought back on a lot. I wanted to avoid this unless labor really needed to be kick-started. But here we were, 4 "good" centimeters, feeling none of my contractions, and an hour from home. So I let her, and then it became very real. 

For a long time it was a joke with the doctor and nurses that I couldn't feel them. My OB even said if they heard a baby crying, they would know I'd had him and wander in then. I reminded her I had been right all along-  I never would have known I was in labor until we were much further along. 

So my water was broken around 12:30-1pm. Between 1 and 2 hours later I started finally feeling contractions after more walking around. Obviously, they progressed. 

Not feeling a thing!! Last belly shot! 

Feeling pretty good. Oh, I think I just had another! *dainty laugh*

Oooh here they are. Still, I've got this. Breath in, breath out. Lets have this baby.

Oh holy hell. I think I might get an epidural. END THIS.

I was going to go all natural. But here's what had happened...... 

We hadn't slept much the night before, when I started feeling off. I couldn't get comfortable and I kept telling myself that I was in this for another few weeks and I had to find a way to sleep. I would need the energy during labor, or I wouldn't be able to go natural. Except I didn't have a few weeks, I didn't have the energy I needed, and thus, I did not go natural. 

I was doing great until about 6 cm at 8:30 ish pm. The problem was that I was so exhausted I couldn't keep my eyes open- but the contractions could. When I was awake and on the monitor, I could hear his heart rate go up a little and knew one was coming. I would prepare myself mentally and work through it. But then I started falling asleep between contractions so they would just shake my whole body- by the time I realized I was having one it was so far ahead of me I just couldn't catch up. So I caved. I knew I needed sleep and I wanted to get even some kind of rest that lasted more than 30 seconds before the baby came. 

It took about an hour before they were able to give me the epidural because of the fluid you have to have and calling in the anesthesiologist. At this point I was no longer really able to speak- which was a real problem because I had to verbally confirm all of my information before they could give me the epidural. I've never spoken so quietly and quickly in my life. During this whole procedure I was stuck in what felt like one strong contraction that couldn't let up. They had no problem getting me to stay still because I couldn't move anyways!

So I got it and looked forward to just laying down for a few minutes with lessened sensation. It was at this point that Mike decided it was his last chance to run out and get dinner. I could not have cared less because I was realizing this epidural had gotten rid of the peak of the pain but the pressure was so intense I was probably not going to get that rest after all. After he walked out the door and the nurse got me into a position that would help him finish getting himself into the right spot (the baby, that is) she checked me. 9 cm! I had changed 3 cm in the time it took me to get the epidural. This is why I do not regret my decision. It was what this labor and this baby called for. So I text Mike to let him know but we knew I still had a little time before I would be ready to push, and looked at pushing for about an hour after that based on the nurse's estimate. 

He got back and ate and I didn't care because some small part of me was relaxing in between the intense pressure and I couldn't speak or move anyways. They had told me that when it was time to push, the pressure wouldn't let up. After Mike ate and he was standing at my bedside I let him know in humor that I didn't feel like I needed to push...I felt like the baby was just pushing himself out. It had been MAYBE 30 minutes since I had been checked at 9 cm but still, he went to the nurse and let her know that I felt like the baby was escaping. She came to check me and yep, time to push! Now it was getting exciting!

She got me in the stirrups as the various nurses that would be involved brought everything in and got ready. I overheard her tell the baby nurse that they don't call the doctor in right away for first time moms because it takes a bit and they had to do some practice pushes anyways. While they set up, I did my first practice push at the end of a contraction. They wanted 3 pushes every contraction. So I did my first practice push and Mike came over and grabbed my leg and the next contraction started. One push, good job! I started to push a second time: STOP PUSHING! I was crowning! One nurse ran for the doctor and she ran in quickly as I was told again to stop pushing to which I replied "I'm not, I swear!". The doctor made it in, started putting on one glove, looked at me, hurried into another glove (no gown or anything else) and turned around to essentially catch the baby. Cooper James was born at 10:25 pm, nearly all on his own. We had our skin-to-skin, and they took him to wash up a bit while they worked on me. I had a minor tear but a lot of blood, it just wasn't going as they planned. Eventually it was enough for them to stop working on me and we had some wonderful time together. We tried a few medications and finally in the middle of the night it calmed. The rest is history! I'm holding my 6 week old and finishing this with one finger because someone is hungry. Thanks for reading!